Alex Kerckhoff

Category: Songwriter Stories

Alex KerckhoffWriting and recording my own album has always been a dream of mine, but for many years I was too scared to chase it. I was managing to make a living as a professional musician playing other people's music but I wasn't happy. More often than not, music was taking a backseat to image, managers would screw me out of money, and I would be surrounded by people who treated me as one more disposable guitar player. Out of fear of losing my gigs and not being able to pay rent, I was forced to put on a fake smile and take it. Through it all, however, I held onto to the hope that I would eventually be able to play my own music for a living.

One day, after another painful rehearsal, the bandleader of a group I was working with handed out strict wardrobe guidelines, detailing everything, even what brand of socks the band was allowed to wear. If we did not follow these guidelines, we would not be paid. I am all for looking good on stage, but since this band had not yet written a single song, I decided I couldn't take it anymore and something inside me snapped. If I wanted a shot at my dream and the life I had imagined, I needed to start now and not waste any more time. I called up a producer friend of mine and the next day we began pre-production for what would become my first album, "No More Rain". I had no idea where this project would lead me, what the album would sound like, and certainly no idea of how I was going to pay for it all. I just knew I had to start taking responsibility and control of my own future.

"Jam #65" is one of the last songs I wrote and recorded, and did so to chronicle what I went through to get up the courage to make this album. Now, the "painful smile" I was wearing on so many gigs has be replaced by a real one. Thanks to the risky leap I took, I love what I do again and feel proud to have created something of my own that no one can take away from me.